Reply to DS struggling in the first few weeks of college, and it's killing me

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It takes time. You need to normalize this for him. College is a big transition for everyone. Encourage him to use the resources at hand and also to find his people through clubs, etc. Has he had a panic attack before, is he sure that's what happened? Treat it as a health issue like any other, not an indication of some huge mismatch.

Your tone is going to determine a lot here about his response. Remember the days on the playground when he'd fall and look to you to see whether it hurt? That's happening again. That's why he called to tell you about the panic attack. He's trying to figure out how worried to be. Have faith in the tools you've already given him to get through adversity and he will have faith in them also.[/quote]

This! It's up to you to normalize this and tell him more kids feel this way than not despite how appearances might have him thinking otherwise. Your reaction to this will either cause him to overreact or to calm down and realize its part of the process- nothing more. At Dartmouth they told us it can take up to 2 months for a freshman to fully adjust. It is hard but a necessary step in crossing the threshold into adulthood- he will gain mich confidence from working this out on his own.

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