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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have read that female infidelity is much more likely to result in divorce than male infidelity. I am sure there are a number of reasons for this, some economic. But I also suspect this is something men can't get over. Will be interested to see the replies,to your question OP.[/quote]

It is pretty interesting. If I had to offer a theory, it's that most women make a very, very big deal about how sex is sacred, how it's so intimate, and how they could never imagine having sex with someone who they aren't absolutely in love with (and yes, I know this is largely horseshit).

Meanwhile, guys pretty much admit they'd fuck a pie if it was warm.

So when women cheat, men usually figure it's about more than just sex. [/quote]

OP here - As I wrote in my previous post, simplistic of views of men and women like these are how you get screwed over in real life. You should be paying attention to the real attitudes that the flesh and blood woman you are with holds about sex, not projecting some nonsense you learned in grade school.

I come off as sweet, prim, and proper.  Skirts, dresses, and used to go to Sunday School.  But I also happen to not ascribe any real importance to sex beyond scratching an itch.  I am about as emotionally attached to any given conquest as I was to the burger I ate last night.  Men go selectively deaf when I am frank about my beliefs or think that it is cute I am trying to shock them.  In reality, I am being frank about what I really think. When I act on my beliefs, they then want to cry foul.

I suspect that women like me are more common than people realize.  There is this ridiculous social pressure on women to express puritanical views of sex that we may not hold.[/quote]

I completely and totallly agree with you!!!

Even though I've never cheated on this DH, I have cheated before this relationship.  Sometimes it was with men I really hoped/wanted a real relationship with... but many times it was just a hot available man, the right situation, and the ability to create more "right situations" and keep it going.  There was even one guy who was so good looking and so good in bed, but I could barely have a conversation with him.  I never thought I was capable of dating someone just for the sex, but there I was, doing exactly that.

If society wasn't as patriarchal and sexist and oppressive to women expressing their full sexuality as it is, there would be a LOT more issues with female cheating.  And if only more women felt comfy calling their men's bluff on the "it's common and it's human" thing by saying "Ok, as long as I can do it too, we're good".  We have really good friends where the DH was about to cheat but he knew his wife was too smart and would catch him, so he asked permission.  She said onlly if she could too.  They both did, then his "friend" ended it but his wife was having a good time with her friend and he flipped the f out.  Told her he was devastated and it needed to end and she had to cut off all contact.  Really?  It was his stupid frickin idea that he cheat and now he can't handle the flipside.  They are no longer married.[/quote]

This is fascinating to me. [b] I am 50 and I didn't know any women like this when I was in college or afterwards[/b], but I have met some more recently.  [b]I really do wonder if this is a generational thing.[/b]  In terms of sex, I really have trouble separating the physical from the emotional attachment.

Either way is fine (sex without any emotion OR an inability to separate the two) as long as you can be honest with yourself.  There are probably more women who can enjoy just the physical aspect of sex, but for many years, we haven't been allowed to express that.

[/quote]

Maybe it has more to do with your friendship circle. I'm 47 and have always been able to separate the two. It's the same with the majority of my girlfriends, both younger and older. Casual sex is nothing new. [/quote]

Yup, I'm 49 and I'm the person who the 50 yr old is replying to.  It's not age/generation, although it probably is a bit about location/local culture, family culture (i.e. in general, how much were girls/women in your family encouraged to be self-sufficient and be anyone they wanted to be? Or how much were they restricted to certain roles and told what they could and couldn't do?).[/quote]

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