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[quote=Anonymous]

OP - I had read a great deal of this thread, but must have missed the listing that said your daughter's BF is Indian and does not want to tell his family.  I will say I have heard that Indian families can be very strict about who a son or daughter marry and had the experience of a good friend -NEVER being accepted by the family who remained allt the way over in India.  Even when he died unexpectedly, the family went after his estate countering his wife who had been married to him for over 20 years.  Come to think of it a lovely, professional friend of my daughter's who is in her late 30s is being strung along by an Indian fellow who again feels the pressure to marry within his ethnic group and she is foreign national herself originally so not a white American.

Given this background, your daughter may need your love and emotional support even more.  I think I would encourage her to take her time as far as jumping into a marriage with BF.  It would be baseline for me to hear that he has told his parents about the relationship with news of an engagement and the expected baby FIRST.  THEN see how he reacts to their reaction.  To be dumped when single and pregnant is one thing, but then to have to go through the emotional upheaval of a divorce, too.  I would get advice on what to say to her as far as ensuring that the legal rights of the child for future support are protected.

Again as posters note,  your daughter is not a child, has a solid education behind her and a job offer which she needs to follow through and accept.  Encourage her to follow through on her relationship with BF, but also to take her time in making any permanent decisions.  BF is the one who seems to be as immature and secretive for whatever reasons as your daughter so both of them together or alone need to figure out their extended family relationship as it may impact on their relationship.  [/quote]

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