Reply to Husband

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Husband"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am going to stop responding to this forum.  I have been hurting over stuff that has happened and came here for advice. Advice that' I can't get in my local community. It seems everyone wants to focus on why I don't want to give my husband oral. This is really besides the point. [/quote]

Dont listen to the trolls OP- there's a lot of losers on here, but it's mixed in with good, well intentioned advice

Most of the good advice seems to be: divorce your husband.  This is a HUGE violation of your trust and it's just not OK.  [/quote]

I agree.  I think that most of the posters may have just been shocked that you are not the "average" DCUM poster, and by slowly revealing bits of information over time people are trying to figure out if you're fake and/or fascinated by an insight into a life we don't know a lot about.  I realize you're probably an emotional mess right now (understandably!), but just try to ignore those you don't want to respond to.

First -- as an observant muslim, what do you think your options are?  Is there any chance you will want to consider abortion?  Or any chance you want to consider divorce?  As a western non-religious woman, I would absolutely be considering divorce right now, and would also be contemplating whether I would want to abort or be a single mom.  But I'm not sure if this is on the table for you.

So, if you're only seeking advice on how to address your current situation without disrupting the status quo, I think you need to sit your husband down and tell him how inappropriate it is to trick you into something like this.  Based on your post, I am going to guess he is at UVa, that you live in Charlotesville, but you are an international flight attendant out of Dulles.  In that circumstance, I cannot imagine trying to work while pregnant after a few months.  There are many logistical issues here, and he needs to take responsibility for them.  I would explain to him that this is your body and he doesn't have a right to make decisions without your consent.  Explain to him that a life of marriage and parenting will require him to respect you, your decisions, and your body.  And then ask him how HE will solve the financial issues.  Also, you rightly raise the risk of miscarriage.  You need to explain to your husband the risk of miscarriage, that you view it as likely, and ask him what he will do to assist you.  Will he help you quit your job now so that you avoid a miscarriage?  Or will he arrange healthcare internationally if you miscarry while you are travelling?  Or be there at Dulles to pick you up when you return home?

My heart goes out to you OP, as this sounds like a very stressful situation, but you'll have to educate me (and other posters) on various cultural roadblocks you may have.  I'll note that you don't have to stay in this culture/life if you don't want to, but those are some pretty touch decisions to have to make when you're in the early stages of pregnancy.

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics