Reply to s/o what warrants a spanking in your house

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mom used to spank me with a wooden stick - one time it was metal because she couldn't find the wooden one.  Oddly I really was a good obedient child who occasionally didn't replace the toilet paper or cleaned up my room, etc.  I think she was dealing with a lot of anger of her own.  I have always been terrified of her and used to think that I was adopted or was a child that my dad had from an affair, and that's why she hated me.  Many of my depressed childhood daydreams were about running away or committing suicide (because then she'll be sorry - or happy that I'm gone).  Years later I am still suffering from depression and it has always negatively affected my life and all of my relationships - might be why I have very disobedient kids.  But still I will never spank them.[/quote]

This is very different from a very occasional pop on the butt with a hand.  this was abuse.  A wooden STICK!  a metal STICK!  WTF.

Of course you are damaged from that - I sincerely hope that you have had lots of great counseling, and perhaps it would be good to enter counseling again.... especially if you feel that you can't have a strong and positive relationship with your children.  Sounds like you don't - saying that you have "very disobedient kids" sounds like you've given up on them, and that's a horrible feeling for children, to feel that their parent has given up on the them.

I do hope that people realize that what this poster is describing is abuse, not the occasional spank for discipline.

When would I spank?  Once in my life.... when the 3 yr old ran across the VERY BUSY, WIDE, residential street after I told her twice that I was almost finished speaking with Mrs. Jones and we'd go in a minute.  She ran across the street - I caught up with her at the other side and spanked her butt up the hill to the house.  then she sat in her room for a while.  [/quote]

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