Reply to How do you deal with boasting by parents of kids without special needs?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Can you find something to brag back about?  My own HFA/Aspie DS has all kinds of difficulties but also some startling abilities and insights.  Maybe you could say "Wow that sounds like a lot of parties.  Emily spent the weekend buried in a college level textbook about volcanoes."  Or building a LEGO model of Buckingham Palace, or watching 20 back episodes of Cosmos because she's really interested in black holes, or whatever it is.  I know not every HFA kid is a secret genius but I'm sure there's something wonderful about your daughter that would put being invited to birthday parties in perspective.

Or maybe just "Thank goodness Emily's a bit of a loner.  I don't know how you can stand going to those parties.  The music's always too loud and the pizza is awful."[/quote]

This escalation is what I think actually takes place in thousands of conversations among parents of NT and SN kids every day and it is soooo transparent and tiresome.  It's one of the things that sucks most about this area.  The above conversation is aggressive and odious.[/quote]

Well, OK, but I meant the language as a joke (which I hope some here got) not as an actual social script for the conversation.  My real attempted point, perhaps lost in failed humor, was that I'm worried that OP seems to accept the value system that has produced her daughter's exclusion and therefore is not fully seeing and supporting how great (if different) the girl is.  I'm fortunate to know a good handful of HFA kids and every one of them is awesome.  Challenged, of course.  But so much more interesting for their challenges, and unique strengths.  (Mine especially, of course).  We desperately need to move this whole society toward a much greater acceptance and appreciation of autistic differences, for the sake of the public fisc as well as common decency.  And I can't imagine how that effort succeeds if the parents of these kids are not fiercely proud of them, and advocating for them.  [/quote]

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