Reply to Making time for kids? Study says quality trumps quantity

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My concern has never been the quality and quantity of time I spend with my kids.  My concern is the quality and quantity of time they spend with others. Am I going to warehouse my children 10 hours a day so that they can spend 2 hours in a luxurious home with me?  Am I going to drop them off to a middle class daycare in a home where I would not be comfortable for 10 minutes?

It's such a small amount of time to sacrifice to raise your children to school age.  What good is your career satisfaction if your kid is being warehoused by people who do not love them during the most formative years of their lives?  I didn't love being a SAHM, but I loved my children and I made that sacrifice for them.  Sometimes you have to do things that aren't your very first choice in the world, but you do them because they're right.[/quote]

Could you please refrain from using such loaded language? A child spending time with a nanny, a small in-home daycare, or other comparable option is not "warehoused." In this economy, dropping out of the workforce may not end up being "such a small amount of time." The news is full of people who have been laid off and have spent the past several YEARS trying to find any sort of job. There are plenty of us who work and still [b]love our children every single bit as much as you do[/b]. To imply otherwise is insulting. If you didn't mean to be, then I'm asking to consider your words more carefully. If you did mean to insult all women who made a different choice, then I'm asking you to consider a whole lot more about yourself. [/quote]

I will never understand why SOME (not all) stay at home moms seem to need to prove that they love their kids more than working moms do. Such a clear sign of insecurity.

I grew up with a full time working mom (after I was ten, she was a single mom), and she and I are still incredibly close and speak on the phone almost daily.  SHE raised me--not day care, not school, not camp--though I spent many hours at all of those places.  She did.  Hers are the values I grew up with --her kindness, her work ethic, her amazing sense of humor, her love.

My toddler has been in day care since she was six months old and has had some wonderful caregivers.  She has a blast at day care and loves telling me about her day.  She's incredibly independent and social, but is very bonded to Mommy and Daddy.  In the evenings and on weekends, we read, dance, sing songs, play outside, do puzzles, go to the pool, all the things you do.  And I promise you, if you think that your staying at home means that you love your kid more than I love mine, you are profoundly mistaken.[/quote]

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