Reply to Do you feel your husband appreciates you as a SAHM?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Do you feel your husband appreciates you as a SAHM?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am not a SAHM but I can't understand why you would want to have kids and NOT be with them or have your partner be with them as much as possible?  I grew up with a SAHM and coming home from school to see her was such an amazing, internal, substantive part of my life.  I just can't fathom how you could have that option and reject it.  [/quote]

Right. There is a huge emotional aspect to this that so many people leave out of this debate.  I will most likely continue to work with children, but absolutely see the benefit of my mom staying home with me.  There isn't anything wrong with making your family and children your number one concern and not having a career.  At the end of the day, no one does anything THAT exciting and most would leave their job if they won the lottery.  If a family can make having a sahp work financially, I say more power to them!  I'm so glad women have many career options now, but do see what we have lost as well.  It used to be assumes a woman would not work and would stay home.  Now it is assumed you'll work and have children for a man.  [/quote]

Exactly... and sadly enough it seems that too often, the working mothers are still doing most of the laundry, the cooking, the childcare, and the cleaning. I'm sure some will say their husbands split it equally, which is awesome.  But being a WOHM often means you are shouldering even MORE of the burden and it's simply not fair to the woman.  I think managing a household takes a tremendous amount of work, and some women choose to stay home to facilitate that.  Not to mention the incredible emotional benefit of being with your children, for both yourself and your kids.  It is a choice, but some people seem to get really angry when moms choose the SAHM route, despite the fact that it absolutely is a viable choice with very specific, pronounced benefits for the family. [/quote]

Yeah really does seem like in most cases the woman gets the shit and of the deal.  I absolutely refuse to continue working and so more than 50 percent of the work.  He knows it.

One thing though is women do tend to take on a lot that is unnecessary.  Stop planning the social life, don't buy presents, don't plan holiday meals, don't make lunches, don't announce when it is time to buy groceries, I could go on.  No one will die and your husband will pick up some of the slack. [/quote]

Yes, I totally agree.  Maybe it's something about this area.  Nowhere else have I seen women act like such absolute fools/martyrs when it comes to their marriages.  They absolutely feel like they [i]must[/i] do it all, or else it will all fall apart.

It reminds me of a very sweet friend of mine (I am 25).  I lived in Dallas and when I met her she was fresh out of a dysfunctional relationship with some loser DJ hotshot guy.  Really feeling damaged.  She met her current husband, and they fell in love and got married.  She decided to stay at home with their kid, and their relationship seems so loving and happy.  She posts often about feeling overwhelmed about housework and raising their daughter and everyone on Facebook is totally supportive, as is her husband.
It makes me sad to think if she were posting on here she would be absolutely attacked as an incompetent selfish gold-digging fool, when she is in fact absolutely NONE of those things (and it truly couldnt be further from the truth).  It seems like in this area there is a distinctive lack of understanding for SAHMs.  Maybe it's because it's an area with such a focus on the attainment of power and people can't understand those who excuse themselves from that race for the sake of their family. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics