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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What's your real problem with your sister?  Because what she did does not "I hate this woman" ... "no love for her" ... or whatever.  Your reaction to your sister is way over the top for the incident.  Are you jealous of her?[/quote]

I think this particular incident was the last straw that broke the camel's back. Just a little of background info so that you can understand why I am not loving my sister,  I will give you one example ... a few months after we got married my husband was in an accident that left him quadriplegic. For the last five months or so DH has been in and out of hospital due to complications related to the injury, since then, this woman has been reminding me in every conversation that DH has never taken dowry to my dad(it's a tradition). I have always assured her that once DH is comfortable to travel and logistics are in place, it will be our top priority. Please don't forget we always send financial support to my dad despite the fact that most of my siblings are very wealthy and more close-by.  Anyhow, about three weeks ago, I had to rush DH to the ER and as always I notified both sides of the family. When my sister called to check on us, my dad's name somehow came up on the conversation. I told her that I had spoken with dad a few days earlier  and he needed money to buy medications which I had promised to send him but with the situation at hand I wasn't going to be able to send it until XX date. She went ahead to say that my dad had enough money for medication and what not, his request was just  a code word for dowry. The following morning she called me again to ask me when we were planning to take dowry. I got very upset with her but I kept my cool. I reassured her once my husband got out of hospital we would see what to do, but on the same note my DH parents and my dad had their own arrangements regarding the matter. After my husband left the hospital, I called my mom and requested her to talk to my sister since she was really stressing me. From what I gather, my sister is probably worried that DH might pass before paying dowry. Please note that dowry is only about $700, we send my dad $300 about every two months. Of course there is that respect that my dad would get among his kinsmen once dowry is paid  which I think is what my sister is chasing after... she probably just "feels" for my dad or something cos she won't be getting even a dime from this money. I don't go looking for pity with my current situation, I just feel like my sister has really been on my case, and she has turned from a big sister to someone who is just constantly looking to start a war.
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Where in your religious does it say that a father is recipient of his daughter's dowry? Stop mixing religion with culture. Your religion also has no room for domestic violence. It's giving chills thinking that a daughter can ask a mom to suck it up. Please stay off the religion excuse, because you know well that your religion has no room for domestic violence. Can you imagine yourself in your moms shoes? You can say it won't happen to me for x y z. What if your daughter says the same to you?[/quote]

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