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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This post just points out how out of hand weddings have become. This attitude that the bride's special day needs to be honored and accommodated no mater how unreasonable is sick.

My guess is that sisters wedding will be a long drawn out affair and op has no idea what other undisclosed expectations she is going to run into if she and her family go.

I don't understand how so many people support these outrageous expectations. Do you all work in the bridal industry?

I swear there are some entitled ex brides who are here trying to justify the crazy sh%t they expected their guests to deal with.

When did destination weddings become a thing? That is some straight up bs expecting the entire family to be there.[/quote]

I don't think it has a lot to do with the bride.  I know I've been very disappointed when family members didn't include kids at weddings (way before I had kids) and I've also been extremely disappointed when people did not show up to family weddings or did not bring the whole family.  I treasure times when we can all be together as one giant family, and since that generally happens most often for weddings and wakes, and weddings are more fun (usually) it means a lot to me when people make the effort to come.  I'm talking weddings that aren't mine.  :) They're for all of us as a family, not just the bride.

OP, I think your mom and sister are reasonable to be disappointed, and I also think it is reasonable for you to decline to bring your kids.  But I think it s a real slap in the face not to bring your DH. And given that you say the cost is twice what it would have cost to fly to her hometown, an you would have done that anyway, I would hope that you would stretch yourself and make the effort.  As you said, you flew cross-country for a death with the kids.  Isn't it worth it to fly to one of a family's great celebrations in life?

To be clear, I think your sister planned badly if the kids are important to her.  (And she sounds like a good aunt within the realities of her personality...I have aunts who never once sent me gifts for anything but I developed deep relationships with them when I was older and I am super-close to them as adults.  Your girls' relationship with your sister is for a lifetime, not just hike they are little kids, so thy may yet grow much closer someday.) I think a destination wedding is a real challenge and not ideal unless you're willing to pay for the people you want there.  So you "win" in my book in terms if who is right and wrong.  But I'd still bring the kids.  I don't think you'll ever regret it.  [/quote]

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