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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
But not EVERYONE has your body type.  I just don't understand how my body, with a perfectly healthy amount of fat, is so awful.  Why is it so bad to have more muscle?  Why would you want to cut muscle off of your body, just to get down to a certain number.  The activities you mentioned aren't muscle building activities.  They'll make you lean but not pack on muscle.  I lift heavy weights - I could comfortably squat much more than your body weight and I have a body that shows that.  I think it's sad that so many women prefer skinny to strong.

Also, 4 or 6 for a woman who is 5'10 is NOT "average".  It is very, very, thin.  I know very few tall women who are so small. You probably already know this, but you have a very distorted body image and it explains your very strong feelings on this matter.  I don't feel insulted by what you are saying, I just feel bad for you.[/quote]

I'm not trying to convince YOU your body is awful.  You aren't the person posting here that your husband doesn't want to sleep with you, the OP is.

I must have missed the point in her comment where she said, "I started going to the gym and lifting heavy weights, gained 40 pounds and now my DH doesn't want to sleep with me."  You know perfectly well that 99% says OP didn't gain her 40 pounds building muscle.  She gained it the old-fashioned way - making her fitness less of a priority, and putting bad stuff down her throat.  So yes, I feel completely comfortable saying her 40 pounds are fat, and aren't good for her in terms of health and in terms of looks.

Also, building muscle and bulking up is not the only way to be fit, so stop pretending that it is. Competitive skaters, runners, gymnasts, skiers, jumpers, bikers are not bulky but fit as hell.  Michelle Kwan is probably fitter that you even though she can't lift her body weight.  You probably can't jump the way she does or can't stretch the way she does.  There are many ways to be strong and fit.  Bulk is not the only way, so lean is not worse than bulky.

Be honest with yourself.  Put one hundred 190-pound women into a room.  How many of them will be "all muscle"? Most will have gained it in fat, not in muscle.

[/quote]

No one is saying that being bulky is the only way to be fit.  But people who have a different body type than you do aren't disgusting.  Given that you said you'd want to take a knife to your  flesh if you had a body like mine, clearly you think that my body would be revolting to you...and that is just depressing.  I don't have the body type to be a sprinter or a jumper because I'm naturally bigger and I put on muscle quickly.  There is nothing wrong with that.  Just as my friends who are naturally lean and wirey shouldn't feel badly about the way that they are built.   It just seems that bigger is always worse here in the body image disordered land, no matter what.  and my final point - YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT OP'S BODY IS LIKE.  Maybe she was unhealthily thin when she got married and now she's at a healtheir weight.  You simply cannot say that someone is categorically obese at 190.

Now I'm really signing off.  This is ridiculous.  I can't believe "you can't judge someone's body fat and fitness solely by her body weight" is so damn controversial.  Only on DCUM, my friends.[/quote]

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