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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A close friend just told me over email that she doesn't think she can attend my wedding because of money. We're having a small wedding in March in a different state from where she lives. Attending would require travel (the costs are modest for flight/hotel, not expensive but not dirt cheap either), but she would not have to take off of work. She said she is thinking about moving to a new apartment rental next year and isn't expecting a high bonus at year end so doesn't think she could swing it. She said she was sorry but would be celebrating in spirit.

I understand that weddings are expensive and traveling to one may not be for everyone, but I am disappointed and a little miffed. We're good friends and have been through a lot of ups and downs in life together, helping each other through bad breakups, bad jobs, touch work situations and the like. We live in different cities, but are in touch quite frequently and have always been on great terms. This is someone I have helped move, someone I've thrown birthday parties for, someone who was the first person to visit me when I had had surgery. A good friend.

While I don't know the full grasp of her financial situation, I know she is paid well and doesn't have debt (she's mid-30s, unmarried, no kids, no mortgage, no car, etc.). She takes a lot of vacations and just recently was in Europe for a friend's wedding. She has known about my wedding date/location for 1.5 years so it's not like it crept up on her. And she knows that a few of our mutual single friends are attending and she could, to save money, ask to split a hotel room for the night with one or two of them. I'm not having a shower or a bachelorette, so the wedding is the only "activity" that is planned.

I'm not sure how to respond to her news. I of course don't want her to feel guilty and/or feel guilted into going if she doesn't want to go, but I am disappointed and I think I need to tell her that. I'm not one to hold a grudge, but I do think that her skipping my wedding may change our friendship a bit. When I look at the list of people we're inviting, she is one I always thought would absolutely be there. When she gets married, I know I will be there for her wedding, and her shower and her bachelorette if she has them.

Nothing has changed in our friendship, we still email every couple of weeks and have long hour-long talks every month and see each other when we're in each others' cities, usually a couple times a year. Maybe she's burnt out on weddings (she's been to a few this past year, all of which she traveled for) or travel or maybe she doesn't feel as close as I feel. I'm not sure. But I feel a little hurt.

Has anyone been there before? Do I say something or not? [/quote]

Three words: [b]Go fuck yourself[/b].[/quote]

Sounds like someone has no friends' weddings to go to...[/quote]

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