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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I strongly recommend family counseling to talk through these issues. There's clearly been some breakdown in the communication, and while I don't think you're abusive, the dynamic you describe is not appropriate for a ten year old.

For example, in the food issue - engaging in a battle of wills to eat this or that will cause these issues. Decide what and when you are serving dinner and serve it. He decides how much to eat of it. If he doesn't eat it, don't worry about it or offer other things (obviously if there's a true aversion, that's different and I would offer something else upfront). He is ten and has survived this long, unless you have a very pressing health matter there is no need to force him to eat food he doesn't want. Maybe he really couldn't eat it. So you basically forced him into lying since he was backed into a corner, and punished him for it.

Ellyn Satter is a great resource on drama free, healthy eating habits: http://www.amazon.com/Ellyn-Satter/e/B000APPUYQ[/quote]

I agree.  The dynamic described here sounds a lot like the one between my mother and I when I was a kid (everything was always such a HUGE issue)...she often had little regard as to why I may have done something (instead choosing just to make sure I was 'punished' and learned my lesson) and in all honesty, I grew up to be a rather emotionally unhealthy teen/young adult due to the dynamic. [/quote]

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