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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Would you say that's more applicable to 40+ men who are still single (as in, never married and don't have kits yet)?  Because I thought that some divorced 40+ dads may simply not want any more children. [/quote]

I wouldn't - in fact, I think single fathers are a whole different kettle of fish because they already have children:

- they don't (necessarily) want more children
- they have children of their own so their lifestyle is already 'adjusted' to including children
- they have children of their own so they understand better what "being a parent means"
- they aren't as susceptible to power-plays where the child's needs are used as a shield/weapon

In short: they are a real peer/equal and better suited to understand where you are coming from.

And all that is just addressing single men 40+.  That doesn't get to "never married".  Which is a whole 'nother issue.  I believe 40+, man or woman, [b]never married[/b], where married == no long term (>5 year + cohabitation) relationship, is a red flag.  They are that way for a reason...maybe good, maybe not, whatever...there is a reason.   It may be a positive, self-affirming conscious decision, or a trail of self-sabotaged relationship wreckage...doesn't matter And I think that is generally due to a fear of commitment/intimacy of a type that makes joining a [i]family[/i] even scarier than just joining a single partner.  Of course, there may be a Shrek or two out there - overlooked diamonds with rough exteriors - where no previous woman has seen the value in the guy, but I thing those are super-rare.  [/quote]

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