Reply to Can a little cheating actually SAVE a marriage?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Of course cheating is abuse.  It is the basest emotional abuse, as you would know if you looked at it from the betrayed spouse's view.  But so few of those advocating cheating want to think of the toll that their lying and gaslighting have on the betrayed spouse.

I witnessed this firsthand.  My BIL cheated on my sister.  He was a complete asshole to her while she tried to figure out what was wrong. It left her destroyed. She came to think that she was an awful person. That's abuse.[/quote]

You clearly have issues with human sexuality given that you seem so obsessed with equating abuse and cheating.

If your sister decided that she was an awful person because her husband cheated on her, the problem then lies with your sister and her lack of self-esteem. If you said that she was hurt by it or even felt betrayed I would understand.

[/quote]

Not the pp you quoted, but the 'sexuality' of cheating isn't usually the issue. It's the lying, gas lighting, rewriting of marital history, etc, etc.  if someone has a ONS, comes home and tells their spouse, then that's not abuse.  But cheating rarely happens like that.  [/quote]

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