Reply to Husbands: do you secretly wish your SAH wives bought in a paycheck?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A lot of husbands seem to think wife returning to work will magically incur no other problems. My neighbor has two kids, one 5 and the other 2, and wants his wife to return to work.

BUT the neighbor *refuses* to do any daycare pickup/dropoff, or handle any emergencies that pop up during the day. I'm not 100% sure he fully understands that for a few years, his wife's salary will be close to nil after aftercare is factored in (or dealing with the randomness of at-home daycares.) [/quote]

I'm a husband who no so secretly wants my wife to return to work.  I understand I will have to do a lot more, but I already do a lot. My wife finds her role as SAH overwhelming.  Even if she does not start out at a high level, she will work her way up, plus the benefit of contributing to retirement. As it is now, I can only contribute 17K/yr to 401K, if she had a 401K and could also hit 17K that would be huge for our future.  I know many bright and successful mothers in my industry who have worked their way up to a good salary.

I've looked into aftercare (our kids are older) and the break even point for her is 30K. I'm positive with an MBA she will be making over that.

There comes a point in time where she will cross the threshold and essentially become unemployable.  If I get cancer or some other physical problem that prevents me from working, we'd be homeless in a year. We have no family to bail is out.  The best thing that could happen to me if something did happen would be an instant death, so they could get insurance. If I were incapacitated long term, I would lose my employment insurance and probably have no money to pay for our private plan. [/quote]

Good luck (I'm the PP you're replying to). My only concern is that your wife would find WOH + being a parent also "overwhelming."

With that said, she can be overwhelmed making $50-60k a year or overwhelmed as a SAH wife. I imagine resentment's usually greater when the SAH wife doesn't even try to do things. [/quote]

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