Reply to I am an Asian woman married to a white guy. Ask me (practically) anything.

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Reply to "I am an Asian woman married to a white guy. Ask me (practically) anything."

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Subject says it all.  As long as it's not too identifying, I will try to answer.[/quote]

I have a few questions:  
Do Asian men or do your Asian friends hassle you because you married a white guy?  [b]No.  I stay away from anyone that would.  [/b]
Has anyone ever threaten you because of your interracial relationship?  [b]No.[/b]
The reason why I ask is because I know that in some communities (black folks I'm looking at you) try to physically harm interracial couples or verbally harass them.  Have you ever experience this type of behavior from your own people before?  [b]No, but I avoid situations where that would happen.  The booking clubs I spoke about earlier, for example.  I would never bring DH there to party even if I were younger.  Why go seeking out trouble???  I don't know anything about the black communities' take on intermarriage.  We are very good friends with one couple where DH is black and wife is white but we don't talk about racial issues.  I do know when I was in my early twenties I was in a club and a couple of black girls came up and asked me what the hell exactly was going on with black men and Asian women???  They were nice about it but clearly pissed off and perplexed too.  They were very attractive black women, I remember.  I was flabbergasted and didn't know what to say.  I think I said "I'm sorry, I don't know anything about that!"  I was there with a friend of mine who was an Af-Am female.  Anyway, if you are in an interracial relationship and black people are harassing you, come on over to my house!  I won't harass you and I'll be your friend.   :) [/b]
So, do Asian men feel threaten by white men like so many black men feel when they see a black women with a white man?  Or are Asian men cool with it?  [b]I'm sure many of them ARE bothered.  I think many men in general are.  Black men may feel threatened when they see a black woman dating out, but so do white men.  Men are men.  Possessive critters, they are.[/b]
Do white women feel threaten by you?  [b]I'm sure they do.  Women are possessive too.  When I was much much younger and single and stupid and self-obsessed and insecure I would feel threatened if I saw an Asian man date/marry out of his race.  "Huh.  What's he see in HER?"  Yeah, I'm admitting it.  But I'm clearly not like that anymore.[/b]
Have you fully assimilated into your husband's culture or do you both embrace each other's cultures equally?  [b]He is pretty nonobservant for a Jew.  There is really little conflict in our day-to-day life that hinges on our backgrounds.  He's a nonobservant Jew and I'm a long-lapsed Catholic.  We share similar outlooks on life.  We have similar energy levels, and similar senses of humor.  We eat the same foods. Our backgrounds do not have much impact.  I'm not really a foreigner.  I grew up in the US.  I have some quirks and so does he (he loves belly lox; the first time I tried it my tongue went numb) but by and large there is mostly overlap.  I think this has been important in keeping the peace in our home.  If either of us felt really strongly about our faith or our culture it would probably be more difficult.  So the short answer is we ignore our cultures to an equal degree.  He'll eat his belly lox and I'll drag a tree home in December.  [/b]

I have more questions, but I'm going to stop here.  :mrgreen:

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