Reply to NYT: professional moms who opted out of work after kids are now opting back in

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I was glad to be able to stay at home but now I'm facing the professional consequences.

I had a master's degree and many years in the workplace and then left it all to stay at home with DD (now 7). Now it's a struggle to get back in. Fortunately I have a supportive husband who has admitted on several occasions that what I do with DD and at home is much more difficult than his career (in finance). But it still sucks that now I have to choose between having a job for which I'm grossly over qualified and being available to my family OR getting back on the career track and have to put DD in before and aftercare every day.

It's frustrating and I don't know which way I will go. It's a shame that I have to choose (no high powered friends in my circle).[/quote]

Boo hoo.

What did you do to ease reentry into the workplace?[/quote]

Why the sarcasm? Am I not allowed to join this discussion?[/quote]

I'm not that poster but I think the point is - what did you expect?  [b]Do you think that you should re-join the workforce at the same level as women who have made other choices, sacrificed time with their families, struggled with WOHM issues, etc?[/b]  Yes, it's unfortunate that the world works this way, but you made a choice and now you are paying for it.  You can't have your cake and eat it too.[/quote]  :roll:  There's a happy medium between your exaggeration and staring on the bottom of the ladder with the 2013 college grads. If she's qualified, why shouldn't she be able to start at the same level where she left off, or maybe just a notch down? [/quote]

[b]Because in this world you can't have both.  Of course she's not entry-level, but it's not fair to the women who haven't taken time off [/b](chose not to or weren't able to).   If there were no career sacrifice, this wouldn't be a choice for anyone.  I don't expect to leave my job for 7 years and come back where I left off.  That just isn't the way the world works.  Staying home is noble, but it comes with sacrifices.  Just like working does.[/quote]

Your mindset is part of the problem.  She's not asking to unfairly take the positions of her colleagues who made the "career sacrifice". Her former peers are miles ahead of her on the ladder already. She's just asking for a job that she is qualified for, and starting at the bottom is unfair, a waste of education and brain power. Not to mention that many won't hire you even for starting positions if you're overqualified.
In all other developed countries, you can do just that - take 1-2 years off and get your old job back. Most women would not SAHM if we had those type of policies here.[/quote]

I agree with your last two sentences.  You're missing my point, though (and I don't make the rules).  Say her peers are miles ahead.  The people who now are at the level she was at before she left have likely been working full-time, are up to date on the current clients/latest technology/current state of the company/etc.  It is unfair to have a person who has taken 7 years off to do something that is, as I said, noble but not career-related, hope back in without missing a beat.  She has already shown her priorities to be elsewhere - which as I've said, is FINE - it's just not realistic to expect to waltz back in.  I'd say the same thing if a person had, say, been traveling overseas for 7 years.  I get that we'd all like to be able to come in and out of the workforce as is convenient for us, but that's not the way the world works.  It's not that complicated.[/quote]

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