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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I actually faced this decision and chose the rich husband, then mommy-tracked.

If I could do it all over again I would take the career. [b]It wasn't until I mommy-tracked that my husband became controlling and lazy in the household. When we were earning the same he was very helpful and egalitarian. [/b][/quote]

This would be my biggest fear.  I have friends who are like this.  She is brilliant, far more brilliant than her husband.  But he did really well with a career in IT and his earning power skyrocketed.  She mommy-tracked.

As soon as she had kids and became a full-time SAHM, he started treating her differently.  And that's been how it is for the last 8 years.  At this point, her confidence is so low that even once her youngest (a baby) is in school, I don't see her pursuing much.  It's almost kind of sad to see what has happened to her.  And it couldn't have been predicted.  He didn't start out like that.  He wasn't that kind of guy before the marriage.  But over time, it evolved that way.

While I think it's great to be able to stay home with your kids when they are young and it is great for families who can afford to do that, I don't know that I would take that path, even if it were available to me, because I would fear what it would do to me and to my relationship with my partner over the long run.

Not saying that happens in all marriages and to all SAHMs.  I've seen plenty who seem happy and appreciated by their husbands.  But I think they just lucked out.  Even seemingly awesome guys can become dismissive of their wives' contributions and perhaps even resentful when they become the sole financial provider.  I think there's also the risk that they lose respect for their wives or come to see them as a dependent instead of a partner.  [/quote]

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