Reply to How bad will it be for dc to be one of the have-nots at private school?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We are blessed that we can pay full freight for our DCs' schools with plenty left over, through luck (all family money). But we both work, and we don't have a lavish lifestyle AT ALL.  We do travel on breaks but nothing ostentatious.  Our cars are nice but not new. Kids have nice clothes but nothing flashy; no one got iphones until they were teens and had to work to pay for them. [b]In short-not everyone who has wealth will flash it in private schools, or judge you[/b] for NOT flashing it.  Your kids will do just fine, OP![/quote]

I'm afraid this will be cold comfort to OP, unless you can assure her that EVERYONE at all area privates is as perfect as your family.[/quote]

There is NO school OP can send her kids to where they will not face some sort of problems with their classmates, be it SES or athletic prowess or math skills or (the list goes on forever).  I don't think OP is asking for outright perfection across the board, just wants to know if there are enough decent kids in private schools so her kid can have good, supportive friends if she makes good choices.  I hope.

As one of the "Cinderella" posters, I will tell you, OP, that at elite private universities the kids tend to divide by SES.  The ultra-rich ones rarely are best buds with the FA/middle class kids, and it sounds like from some of the posters' experiences above that's likely to hold true for elite privates too by middle school/high school age.  It is not that they are rude...they just tend to trend toward other kids like them.  In a way it is better, because if their best friends are from similar economic backgrounds because a lot of the issues you are concerned about become nonissues, or they have someone else they are going through it with together which always lessens the burden.[/quote]

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