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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DH and I both have divorced parents that range in age from 82-86.

The range of expected combined inheritance across the group of them is 2-10 M (this is my best ballpark for purposes of this thread based on possible spend down for health care and market losses for the one who is an aggressive investor)  [b]Both dads are pretty sturdy and have significantly younger wives, which will likely reduce their need to use assisted living.[/b]   Both moms have lost their partners to death and are extraordinarily stubborn and living independently.

I think of it as money, if it occurs, that we can use to help our kids get a strong financial start.  Not counting on it, hoping this will not be soon but realize they are getting older.

We continue to fund our own retirement.  There was a point when we moved a substantial part of our investment dollars towards college because we felt comfortable with where retirement was going.[/quote]

The fact that you think the existence of these younger wives is a money-saving mechanism that is preserving some portion of your inheritance is either funny or sad, depending on how much you need the money.  You aren't getting anything from the remarried daddies; time to start being more grateful for your "extraordinarily stubborn" mom and MIL.[/quote]

Not sure you are worth replying to.

OP asked a question and I tried to give the best answer I could with the information I have.  The fact that I consider a wide range of variables that impact the potential outcome [b]does not make me some plotting gold digger,[/b] i am simply practical.  Could my step mother get hit by a bus tomorrow?  Possibly, but it is unlikely.  Does her existence impact how long my father can live independently given their 10 year age difference, yes it does.  Independent and assisted living in retirement communities are among the largest costs of the last years of one’s life if we are lucky.  How much of that care will be needed is a variable to be considered.

I am sorry that you have some other agenda to push.  What a sad sack you are.[/quote]

This . . . is not what the PP you're replying to you said, or even implied.  I think you misread the comment.  You also still seem to not understand it, so I'll say it plainly: your dad and FIL's money is going to their new wives, not to you and your DH.  That money is gone as far as you're concerned.  Stop mentally thinking it will come to you in any amount, whether or not it is preserved by the trophy wives' selfless eldercare.[/quote]  is it standard policy for the new wifes to get all the $$ and not the kids?[/quote]

Lord.  "new" wife here (my stepkid will likely get a larger inheritance because of me, since they will get a portion of my estate and their dad was able to save more because I make more than he does).

Only if your dad is incredibly selfish and/or stupid and picks poorly.

But, if you expect your stepmom to do the heavy lifting of elder care - don't begrudge her the money.

[/quote]

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