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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Bad marriages "
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[quote=Anonymous]My closest friends who knew me before i was married generally thought something might be wrong, and a few very perceptive people could sense it, but most people were shocked when I told them I was leaving my marriage. A psychologist named Gottman talks about "Four Horsemen," which are four types of destructive communication styles: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling. People who saw my ex spouse do these things were much more likely to sense a problem. These "Horsemen" are indicators of likely divorce. They're even better predictors than addiction or infidelity. My ex didn't do them in front of other people very often, but they were a huge part of my life inside the home, in the car, and when we were on vacation. My ex also lost sexual interest in me, and I eventually lost sexual interest in my ex after years of rejection. Those things aren't always apparent to people who see a couple around the neighborhood, at schoool, etc. [/quote]
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