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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had a terrible childhood and I am giving my daughter an awesome childhood. It's very therapeutic.

I think the psychology term for it is "reparenting." You get to heal the wounds from your past by making it right the next time around.

So, my kid is better than me. It's a wonder to experience.[/quote]
+1

I grew up with overachieving parents (who consider themselves intellectuals) and it was a suffocating experience.  I was made to feel I never measured up despite being quite an overachiever myself.  So I vowed to never compare my kids to anyone especially me or DH (who is one of smartest ppl I know), never judge and simply to love and nurture them in every way possible.  They have turned out to be wonderful people first and foremost.  They are also accomplished, multi talented and socially well adapted.  Most importantly, they are not copies of DH and I although their share traits w us. They are their own people.  It is indeed a very rewarding experience.

I have watched many friends struggle as they come from a part of the world where parents are the mold for the kids to conform to.  The family relationship is fraught from day one as the kids are constantly judged and criticized, from physical appearance (ie: why are you shorter than your mom or dad, why do you not have big eyes like your mom or dad, why are you darker than your mom or dad) to intelligence (ie:  how can you not do this when I was the smartest kid in my class), to physical ability (ie: how can you not throw the ball properly when I am the star basketball player, how come you gain weight so easily when I am still slender in my 50s).  The parents always feel they are the best and they know it all.  When the kids “act” out or push back, they blame on the kids’ personality and how they just aren’t cut from the same cloth.  An acquaintance recently told her DD that if she knew the DD would dislike her childhood this much, then she should’ve never given birth to her.  Most kids in our culture can’t wait to leave home and never look back.  The parents again bad mouth these kids, calling them ungrateful.  It is so sad. [/quote]

Desi right?[/quote]

No way this is 100 percent East Asian [/quote]

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