Reply to Mom chose vacation over childcare with no notice

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Reply to "Mom chose vacation over childcare with no notice - am I wrong to be upset?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I really hope you're a troll because otherwise you'd be a terminally clueless and entitled piece of human garbage, OP.

Can't you see she burns out regularly and needs mental health breaks????

She can't tell you in advance, because you're her daughter and she doesn't have the communication tools to do so. But this is not her fault. You put her in this situation. If she was a salaried employee, she would follow company rules about advance notice when taking leave. Here she cannot.

TAKE THE HINT. This poor woman might never find the courage to have the hard conversation with you.

[/quote]

She’s very blunt so she’d tell me no, if she were burnt out. She’s young (50s), retired, and enjoys spending time with my kids, they call her mom and are close to her. I don’t think that’s the problem, it’s just that she doesn’t give proper notice, because I’m her daughter.[/quote] So find other childcare.  Either this is a dealbreaker for you, or it isn't. [/quote]
I’m planning to talk with her about what would work best. One option I’m considering is enrolling the two older kids in aftercare, so she would only need to focus on the younger two. I really don’t feel like I’m asking for too much. When I was growing up, my grandma cared for me and my five siblings, so I also feel like it’s reasonable for her to do the same, or to see if one of my siblings might be able to help out as well.[/quote]

Omg :shock:

Yes, in an ideal scenario your mom would have told you in advance, but in that same ideal scenario, you would not be using her as your primary child care plan. It's a gift if a grandparent keeps grandchildren and should absolutely not be an expectation. You're view on this is skewed and based on your mom's behavior it looks to me like she's trying to tell you that. [/quote]

OMG OMG OMG

What your grandma did is irrelevant. Your kids are your responsibility. Not your mother's and not your sibling's. This is America. [/quote]

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