Reply to Just learned my MIL turned away a friend who came to see me in the hospital

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Reply to "Just learned my MIL turned away a friend who came to see me in the hospital"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, sorry everyone is being insane on this thread.  Your story makes perfect sense to me and I think you are seeing something about your MIL that you and DH need to discuss and be very clear about: she views your family as under her jurisdiction.  That viewpoint clearly does not work for you.  I think you are smart to hold off on responding since emotions run high at this time and you don’t want to escalate unless it’s needed, but I also think this is a big red flag.  I would do the following:

1) Apologize to friend and write a nice note and invite her to meet the baby some other time.

2) Have a big talk (maybe with a family systems therapist) with DH about where you each land with this kind of thing.  I am a very private and independent person and this would be a huge problem for me but some families are more enmeshed.  It’s more important that you and DH be on the same page than that MIL be put in her place about this instance.

3) Depending on how that talk goes I would have DH consider taking his mom aside and gently but firmly telling her that she crossed a line and you expect her to be respectful of anyone that you and DH choose to include in your lives.[/quote]

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