Reply to Can boys join Girls On The Run?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's not the existence of GOTR that is alienating boys.  It's having parents who look at GOTR and see something that is objectively harmful to their boys.  That's where the messaging of deprivation is coming from.  That's what they are seeing and internalizing.  Do better.

-Mom of boys[/quote]

I'm a mom of two, both boys, and I agree.  These manosphere voices teaching boys to hate girls is causing harm, the existence ouf girls' programs is not. My spouse and I actively worked to add a science fair club to our kid's school, so we have walked the walk in actually adding things to the school.[/quote]

I think this is the way. Boys in elementary school are not seeing women being oppressed historically in their school environment (GOOD), so it doesn't make sense to them. But the manosphere is attractive to boys and men who see themselves as victims. It's up to us to build them up in positive ways at young ages to avoid that, not in opposition to girls, just so they have opportunities to explore and excel in their own individual interests and don't need to see success as a zero sum game. And look for good male role models. [/quote]

I also had a friend who the manosphere totally destroyed.  Lost his girlfriend, lost his job, lost his friends. The victim mentality destroys young men.

I work with college interns and the best thjng you can do for young people is individually build them up. I had a college intern who lost his sports scholarship and we helped him find funding from other sources, plus a job lined up.

Again, I see a bunch of people whining about girls stuff and actually doing anything to help boys.  Tearing girls down doesn't help boys.[/quote]

Literally nobody is tearing girls down on this thread. I am a mom very concerned about my son being vulnerable to the “manosphere” and a huge hurdle is explaining to him the disparate opportunities and rules for girls vs boys. [/quote]

Start a club, organization for the boys in your school.  Theee was no magic fairy that addressed the need for the girls to get leadership and running educataion....it was likely a mom or dad that started it.[/quote]

That was then and this is now. I think we all know that the cultural infrastructure (grants, leadership organizations, institutional buy-in) is heavily tilted to girls’ programs. It’s an open question whether all schools would even allow or support a boys-only club. [/quote]

Mom of a boy and a girl here. It’s really not, since multiple people have posted boy equivalent clubs exist at their school.

And you are part of the problem if you are teaching your sons that discrimination and problematic social norms are a thing of the past. I am a woman in science and I was asked about my reproductive plans in my dissertation committee meeting not long ago at all and not long after my advisor admitted he figured I would end up following my husband wherever he went following my defense. A former boss later told me he hired me because he found me attractive, and repeatedly tried to get me to do inappropriate things like go in a hot tub after work with him (I was 10 years younger and had a serious boyfriend) I also have had to repeatedly set boundaries with my in laws who think women should not work outside the house. Many women who I knew from my program have quit science all together because research remains incredibly unfamiliar friendly and they were unable to do the majority of the care for their children and houses and maintain that type of career. I don’t know of a single man who had to make that choice.

So in light of that experience, I take a very active role in a science program at my kids school. It is NOT restricted to either gender but the two of us who did a lot of the work to make it happen had a passion for making women in the sciences visible, though there has never been any girl specific messaging in our program.

What we DID NOT expect is that we literally have not been able to get a dad to help out for 4 years. We have actively asked for male volunteers because men can be scientists too! But nope, not interested. I suppose the boy moms blamed the “girl power movement” for the some how.

The point is, people make time for what is important to them. If you want your son to have an opportunity to run there absolutely is one. If you want it to be at the school you might have to make some effort.[/quote]

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