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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DH has been awful - terrorizing me for months, lots of emotional and verbal abuse. I have a therapist, and every online source, including Dr Ramani would point to the fact that this marriage is over. Yet I feel horrible ending a marriage of 20 years. I am very conflicted.[/quote]

You can't change him. You can change yourself. What's your part in these conflicts? Is there a way to get him to therapy so he can work on his part? What are the circumstances? Is there a way to change those? For example, get less stressful or better paying jobs. Moving from a large money drain house to a smaller fully paid home? Moving kids from expensive privates to public schools? Limiting contact with in-laws (yours ir his) if a factor? Quitting alcohol or shopping addiction? If you want to save this marriage, you two can't continue same behavior and expect new results. [/quote]

This is a perfect example of how people who haven't experienced domestic violence and abuse have no idea how to deal with abusers. [/quote]

I assumed that @$$backwRds stuff was the Troll. [/quote]

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