Reply to "Normal" reaction to loss of parent, what is typical?

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Reply to " "Normal" reaction to loss of parent, what is typical?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think it's more abnormal when an old (like 85+) person dies of natural causes and their child acts like it is the shock of the century. Did you think they would live to be 100+?[/quote]

Exactly. You should be be prepared for your parents' deaths by the time they're 60. A heart attack could come along and take them away in an instant.

Why do so many people have such unnatural and unhealthy attitudes towards death?[/quote]

You post s**t like this on every thread. 60 is not “old” nowadays, but regardless, there’s nothing psychological about being shocked or devastated when people die at 60. My kids will be in their twenties when I’m 60.

And while I agree that it’s not shocking when a parent in their 80s dies, it can still cause very deep grief. But there’s no right or wrong way to experience it.[/quote]

60 is old. Not old enough you should be surprised if they don't die, but old enough you shouldn't be surprised if they do. If a 60yo dying hits you that hard, you've failed in your preparations. People in their 20s don't need their parents anymore. It actually removes a lot of the potential burden of elderly caregiving, leading to a happier life overall.[/quote]

My MIL was 63 and her doctor had said she was one of the healthiest patients he had.  She swam every day.  Then she was diagnosed with a glioblastoma,   There's no warning, no lifestyle risk factors, just a cruel, always fatal tumor that takes away the things that make someone them before it kills them.

So yeah, it's going to hit hard to watch your healthy mom suddenly start losing her memory, her speech, and her ability to control her body.  I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.
[/quote]

Well, don't even get me started about the US's backward practices on medical assistance in dying. It is good that it is starting to become an option in some places, but the process is still far too slow and difficult. You should be able to set it up as part of a living will in advance of a diagnosis. [/quote]

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