Reply to Remarried -- how best to structure my will/trust for my adult children.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m pp, and yes OP your kids should at least be co-healthcare directives. My dad’s wife wanted to pull his life support immediately (when he was placed over night) before my sibling and I arrived. I told the doctor that I had his notarized POLST that said moderate life support was acceptable and we’d gotten flights to be there and that I’d sue the hospital if they listened to his wife.

You don’t think it will be contentious, but it typically is. [/quote]

It's not fair to keep someone on life support for your needs.  My sibling did that to my dad and put him through surgeries that it was clear he would not make it through and if he did, he'd be in a nursing home the rest of his life, which he didn't want.  You need to do what's best for the person, not you.  I'd want someone to pull the plug and I have told my kid that.  [/quote]

Please learn to read and not throw your family’s dysfunction on to others. Your situation is not remotely similar to mine, where she wanted to pull the plug before we arrived 10 hours later (and then made hospital staff jump hoops at 1am after they planned to do it at 9am because she’s that awful). My dad died peacefully knowing we were there. [/quote]

You clearly have dysfunction and there is more to the story.  Maybe you didn't treat either of them well.  If my husband goes first, I will not tell his kids as they weren't kind to him in life and would only do a money grab.[/quote]

Behold your cautionary tale, OP. ^^ [/quote]

My kids are nice to me but I’m a woman. Usually with kids are not nice in life to a parent, it means the parent in question did something extremely toxic to the kids or their other parent during marriage and/or divorce [/quote]

Or, they were brainwashed by the custodial parent to hate the other parent.

[b]You aren't entitled to an inheritance.  We just excluded my husband's kids as he hasn't talked to them in years and the mom brainwashed them against him ([/b]she cheated and took them without his consent and then would not allow contact - yes, he went to court many times and she made promises and never follwed through).  He occasionally hears from one but it's superficial texts.

My dad gave all his money away to his female friends... we didn't expect anything.

My mom is giving all her money to my sibling as has always favored them (and when I found out, I cut contact as I don't care about the money but they kept it secret and my sibling was horrible to me at my dad's funeral - there may have been money but they both controlled everything and did a money grab on what little there was and my mom never so much buys me or my kids even a dollar tree gift - she has tons of money).

People need to stop focusing on the actual money and look at the relationships.  [/quote]

And here is another cautionary tale ... do not get remarried. Just don't do it. [/quote]

Yeah, that's the same evil step mom. She's all about the money, otherwise she wouldn't have cut out her step kids and her own family. [/quote]

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