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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DH and I are both federal employees. I have been misersble in my job all year but managing to avoid being laid off. DH still loves his job. We have one son who is in seventh grade.

I just got an offer for my absolute dream job - it is very secure and pays about 20% more than I currently make. Problem is that the job is halfway across the country in a town where DH would have trouble finding a job easily. If he did, it would be less money and not as good as his current job.

The way I see it, I have three options:

1. Decline the job offer and remain miserable as a fed, hoping things might change.

2. Take the job offer and we all move. Not having DH’s salary immediately would be a financial hit but housing is much cheaper in the new city so we probably could afford to purchase a house with no mortgage.

3. Take the job offer and only I move. DH stays in DC with son (who likes his school). The new job allows partial telecommuting so I could be back in DC most weeks from Friday-Monday.

What would you do?[/quote]

option 3 until your son goes to highschool- then re-evaluate.  We faced this decision in 2018 and my instincts were to stay behind with the kids and I caved to "keep the family together" and we moved only for covid shutdowns to happen 9 months into the move making it completely unnecessary.  I'm not saying something insane like that will happen but I wouldn't uproot everyone if you can do it gradually and with intention, making it less painful.  look for a nice neighborhood, school, house while you work there and really suss out what you'd like and need and what life will look like.  We ended up loving our midwestern neighborhood but I would have bought a different house and made some decisions differently if I wasn't under pressure to do it before the school year ended.  let your husband wait this administration out.  [/quote]

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