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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I could have written this OP. I’m now in the process of separating.

I’m so sorry. It’s very lonely and a special kind of invisible hardship to be married to a man like this. It’s also devastating to me that my kids won’t live the life I imagined for them. But there is only so much of this behavior that one person can tolerate. I did it for a long time. It got a lot worse.[/quote]

OP here. Gosh, I'm so sorry.

And yeah, you're right, it's extremely isolating.

Every year for Mother's Day or my birthday, he doesn't even try to do anything special or out-of-the-ordinary for me.

I have a number of food allergies, so I can't have French toast (no wheat, eggs, other foods that aren't top 9) but I eat fruit, potatoes, he could make wheat free/egg free waffles (I do this all the time for the bigger kids who also share a split of *my* food allergies) but he can't be bothered to make an effort even on the special days.

He always claims he doesn't know what to make me food wise because of my allergies and says he never knows what to get me "because I don't have any hobbies" without realizing that A) I actually have interests that he should know after 15 years and B) I don't have hobbies because I don't have time or energy for hobbies.

Jush hurts that he basically says he doesn't even know me after all this time.

Meanwhile, I am incredibly thoughtful of everyone, special days or not. I cook for family when they're having hard times, I get meaningful gifts for them. I'm always checking up on people, staying connected with long distance family and friends, even just sending a text letting them know I'm thinking about them.

It sucks that I don't even have a partner who values me and can even do two days a year to make me really feel loved.[/quote]

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