Reply to Envious of the life my kids are having without me after divorce

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[quote=Anonymous][twitter][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You should’ve had a better lawyer during the divorce negotiations. [/quote]

As someone going through it now, and want to keep it out of court, how do you force someone to agree to something they don’t want?  Court doesn’t care about his bad behavior or cruelty and it won’t move the needle for alimony or division of assets.  So, at some point, he can just say “you want too much” and stop negotiating, knowing he will get a better deal from a judge. How does a better lawyer change that? Honest, genuine question.[/quote]

OP and all this above. I live in a state that mandates mediation before court. I knew I didn’t even want to get to mediation because of the focus on give to get. Mediation in my state, and maybe this is universal, is a specific process with an outside mediator chosen by a judge with a set amount of days and interactions. If it does not concise with an agreement, off to court you go. Court would decided a settlement that would have been very much to the letter of the law and precedent in my state especially with child support (minimum from a table until your income is off the table and then it still isn’t much), alimony (33% of years married), and assets (50/50).

I started with my priorities- custody and child support- and worked my way down the list. There is a point where no attorney in the universe can force someone to do certain things, especially when the alternative to negotiated agreements (mediation, court) will be better for the party that is advantaged. It is what it is. [/quote]

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