Reply to In-laws upset they can't visit ON grandchild's birthday

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Let them be upset, OP.

They can visit at another time, but if I'm hosting one set of parents, I don't have bandwidth for the other set. At most, we'd do a large family dinner at a restaurant with the 4 grandparents, but they certainly wouldn't be visiting in my house during that time!

Think of this as a great opportunity to reset expectations going forward, as you said. In the future, your kids choose what to do on their birthday. Grandparents are not the priority here.

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The kids can choose what they do on their birthday but [b]I am not turning away my parents or my inlaws[/b] who want to celebrate with them sometime the birthday week, whether that is at home or a restaurant. None of this is complicated or difficult nor should it cause drama. [/quote]

DP that's fine for your situation.

OP should not be criticized for setting boundaries around high maintenance in-laws.

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I am unclear how they are high maintenance. Again, wanting to celebrate a grandkid's bday is not HM.[/quote]

They need to be "catered to".

[i]"I don't love having them on the kids' birthdays because it kind of ruins the day to have to cater to them instead of the birthday child"[/i][/quote]

According to the DIL.  I take this with a grain of salt. [/quote]

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