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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why is everyone’s first response to call a lawyer and initiate divorce?  A marriage of 18 years deserves more than a knee jerk reaction and vindictiveness.

Why not talk it out honestly?  I heard your
conversation and it sounds like you are having an affair, I’m deeply hurt.  Can this be saved and do we want to?

I’m not defending the wife.  Cheating is wrong no matter the circumstances.  But marriages are complicated and can recover from betrayal.[/quote]

Maybe I’m wrong but it sounds from
the original post that based on the call it isn’t just a one time no strings thing.

I once stayed (not married at that point but partnered for a long time) with my partner who cheated.  We worked on it and they cheated again.  Fool me once…

OP also get STD tested but maybe pay for it out of pocket if your wife has access to insurance information.  When the above happened I went to a Planned Parenthood and paid in cash.

For me it was the lying more than anything.  Sneaking around, lying, potentially giving me an STD.  I just find it to be so disrespectful.

A one time thing and you use protection?  Bad, but stuff happens.  Continuing to lie, sneak around, miss family events, and potentially give your
Partner a disease is a big NO for me now that I experienced it.

OP your wife clearly has issues.  Talk to a lawyer.  Talk to a therapist and don’t be pressured to stay if you don’t want to stay. Your wife probably had an idea that you know and that’s why she keeps asking if you’re ok.  [/quote]

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