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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here - MIL says she is donating all of them now :-(. And will rebuy the kids other things. I told her this is ridiculous, just give the kids the cards. I told her this is not about the cards and that the kids will use them throughout the year. I told her that it was about how she always just hears what she wants to and never listens to anyone else. I told her one year what I was buying DH....then she bought him one too. I told her not to put my DS in church daycare when we visited and she slipped out and put him in the daycare. DH and I asked that she not send us any more religious propoganda...she sends us cards saying our family will go to hell (in nicer words) if we don't embrace God. It's been like this for years...and to the pps that say I can't change her...well its still so frustrating! I am tired of everyone just bowing down and letting MIL manipulate everyone into doing what she wants. Nobody has a flippin backbone. I was not raised to be a doormat. I have apologized to her for even saying anything and for not being gracious. I do feel like I stepped down to her level. But in the end, she will make this whole situation about her and boo hoo me. She already sent out a prayer request to help her in her prayer group. Does this clear things up a bit?[/quote]

Sure. She's maybe a nutjob.  But you are letting her get to you.  Fighting fire with fire just leads to scortched earth.  You need better strategies.

1. If she sends you stuff you don't like, throw it away.  Ignore.  Move on.  Why are YOU letting this bother you so much?  She's not even your mother...

2. Stop telling her what to do.  You know it doesn't work and it pisses  you off when it doesn't work.  You are therefore behaving completely irrationally.

3. Do not trust her to convey information to any other person in the family.  You (or better yet, your husband) should communicate with his siblings etc directly.

4. If you give her power, she will wield it.  So for Pete's sake, stop.

Really, OP, you are being a drama queen and that is the WORST thing to be when you're dealing with another drama queen.[/quote]

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