Reply to Is it normal to want your kids to go to better colleges than you did?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So my personal story is actually not quite this, but I wonder how people feel and act.

(My personal piece is that as a first time college applicant in my family, I wanted Georgetown, got in, my parents couldn’t afford it, and I went to American for a low price and am annoyed to have gone to a school with an inferiority complex, which I clearly also have.)

I have this sense that if my high schooler regardless of plans doesn’t go to a school more prestigious than mine, I probably screwed up. Didn’t help enough or make things happen that could have developed the kid’s potential.  And kid probably doesn’t want to think of themself as an underachiever. [/quote]
Yes, unless you're a complete narcissist, a parent would generally hope a child had everything better (grades, athletic ability, popularity, happiness, money, health etc). I can't be unique in this line if thinking. [/quote]

Unless a parent had a bad or miserable life, why must they want "better" for their kids? I have not had any extraordinary life, but I'll be thrilled for my kids to have comparable. What defines "better?" "Different," perhaps; but "better?" not necessarily.

Same for college. We're just very happy kid #1 is even IN college, having started at community college and now attending a VA state public. I am thrilled for our #2 who will be attending another VA state public that is a perfect fit [u]for her.[/u] I would not consider it "better" than my alma mater and its "prestige" is definitely not better than my spouse's alma mater.

I find OP's question to be a ridiculous one.[/quote]

+1 I have a good life with my regional public U degree. Why does my kid's life need to be "better?"

I did have to compromise on college choice because my first choice, W&M was too expensive OOS. But where I went ended up being a great fit for me and was a good place to start out my path. Now I live in VA and, yes, I'd have loved for one of my kids to go to W&M. But it was too small for one (he went to VT) and too big for the other (she went to a LAC). They will figure out they own lives from there. I think having expectations that your kids have to do "better" than you in some way is a ridiculous thing to put on a young adult. They need to be free to figure out the life that works for them.[/quote]

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