Reply to Why do people blame their siblings over parental favoritism? What is the appropriate response?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you read your post it’s very critical of your sibling, “perceived favoritism,” for example. You sound judgmental and a bit like you are gaslighting. I don’t know if that’s what you project to your sister, but if so, it’s not helping. It seems like you want to correct her not improve the relationship.

If you want to improve the relationship try listening, validating her emotions, and concentrating on her.[/quote]

Sometimes perception is reality and sometimes perception is perception.  There are at least 4 sides to this story and we only have 1.

FWIW, sure if she brings it up with you validate her feelings but I'm not sure it's going to solve anything.  Vicitims tend to be looking for more than validation, they want to win.[/quote]

I mean, if you feel like a victim because your sibling wants to discuss your childhoods … then what does that say about you? [/quote]

Is this question based in fact, endearing, and emotionally neutral, 
...or is is one that is not based in fact (the poster you responded to never said they were a victim) and placing the other person in a position in which they are to think bad about themselves at your command?

You say no one in your family likes you or considers you a reliable narrator, but when you talk like this, your family's reaction is the consequence.

It doesn’t work to act poorly, blow up at people, then test to see if they still love you to see if they really love you in the first place. This makes people actually not like you, yes, even if they are family. Then demanding they love you because "we are family" is not going to get the results you want. And then, there will be the claim of no one has ever loved me. This is the narcissists cycle.[/quote]

Who do you think you are talking to? do you think your experience is universal? [/quote]

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