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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I rushed at UVA in 2010 (wow...how is that possible) but did not pledge a sorority. Not going to lie, it was...difficult.

I never really thought about/wanted to join a sorority prior to college - it was not on my radar, but I signed up for rush because it was such a big thing at UVA. I was out of state and didn't know anyone. Long story short, I ended up getting dropped from most sororities and getting  a bid from what those on campus [b]called the 'fat', 'loser' sorority [/b](I may have been a loser, but I was not fat!) I declined the bid and decided not to be in a sorority at all.

EVEN AS someone who didn't really care that much about being in a sorority and went on to have good friends and a good college experience, it really stung. I remember telling my mom that 'a third of the girls at this school must not like me' after getting dropped nearly everywhere, and I always felt a bit insecure wondering what it was. In class, I'd wonder if I was sitting near a girl [b]who dropped me or had talked badly about me during the decision-making process.[/b] Even looking back today, I wonder what was wrong with me at the time. And some people took it even harder - a girl in my dorm was so devastated her parents had to come up, and she nearly withdrew from the school (she ended up staying, fortunately, and [u]getting really involved in a cool hobby group where she ended up meeting her husband, so all worked out[/u]).

Anyways, I find the system problematic and wouldn't support my daughter joining a sorority or rushing. [/quote]

So you met these girls, they picked you, and you decided to reject them because random people said they were fat losers? You come off as the mean girl here. I wonder if they sat in class and saw you as the person who came to their events, but then rejected them.

Greek life isn't for everyone, but you opted in. You went through the process and it worked because you were offered a spot. YOU rejected it because you decided you were too good for it.

And every college has great groups that aren't tied to sororities. You wrote about the girl from your dorm, but did you do something else? Because you seem like you haven't moved on.[/quote]

[b]The sorority in question essentially invited everyone back[/b], so it wasn’t so much that they picked me as that they needed bodies. But a couple things…first, in hindsight, a sorority would not have been ‘for me’ at all, regardless of it it had been the one I wanted or not (I’m very introverted and don’t really like large groups) and second, I agree the stereotyping, etc. is wrong but can you blame an insecure 18YO new to college and not knowing anyone for not wanting to join a group people said these horrible things about? Let alone pay thousands of dollars of my own money to be a part of this group.

To your second question, of course I did…in fact, I recently got married myself and had many members of the club I Did join in attendance. [/quote]
The group that was the most open and accepting wasn't good enough for you. An opportunity to participate squandered, but I'm glad you found another club.

This is so close to the mentality here that the only good colleges are the ones that reject almost everyone who applies.

[/quote]

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