Reply to Small acts that signal to strangers you are TA

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m not talking about obvious things but small ones.

I’ll start: 
- taking calls or listening to music on speaker in public setting 
- putting your bag on a chair in a crowded place where a person could sit 
- having unnecessarily loud engine [/quote]

I am going with making vague, anonymous posts on social media complaining about someone instead of having the confidence to address that individual directly, IRL like a competent adult. People who make those sorts of posts are total glass bowls. [/quote]

DP but I will disagree with you. Some people are not worth dealing with directly. I have learned this the hard way. I have never lacked for confidence and used to always address conflicts with people by speaking to them directly. What I've learned is that this only works if the other person is actually a decent person who wants to get along with others. But a lot of people become instantly defensive, interpret what you are saying in weird ways, try to retaliate by acting even worse, etc. Like most people are not very mature or good at admitting their mistakes.

With someone like that, your best recourse is to avoid them when reasonable, respond neutrally when you have not choice but to deal with them, and if necessary, find ways to work through your frustration with them. Usually my DH and I just do this for each other, it's one of the nice things about being married -- live-in sounding board for when other people are the worst but it's not worth it to make a whole thing of it.

Maybe OP doesn't have a spouse or their spouse *is* TA. Zero harm in complaining about this stuff here and it probably helps to get it off their chest.[/quote]

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