Reply to Why do parents punish the more successful children?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

Doubt it because the family patterns and way of doing things are hard to break. My sister never worked in her life. It was always, [b]"oh, she has it haaaard, she has kids[/b]".  Guess who got nothing for having kids and working?[/quote]

This is my family too! My sister is a mess- SAHM (with hobbies that take a lot of time and money- and get in the way of taking care of her kids) and the rest of the family caters to her because “it’s so hard! She has kids!”

Meanwhile, I have kids and a full time job and  it is never acknowledged that it might be hard. I’m always expected to travel to them, rearrange my work schedule/plans, etc. It’s ridiculous [/quote]

I feel seen. This is my life too with my ILs.

And they “cut us out” of the will because “you guys are fine” while SIL is a hot mess. But don’t worry because we also get the honor of taking care of them when they age, handling all the legal work, and DH is executor of the will. And working full time and have young kids, one who is disabled and will need lifelong support. But SIL is happily enjoying her hobbies as a SAHM with 20 yr old kids….[/quote]

NP here. My mother recently told me that she had redone her estate planning now that my father had passed and I would probably be very disappointed. It is worth noting I have never expected or hoped to inherit a single thing from her, she's horrible with money and I actually have been expecting to pay out of pocket from my own money to settle her estate/pay for her expenses when she dies, sty I wasn't upset when she initially said this. However, she does own a lot of real estate, including the homes that my 2 siblings each live in and a beach house. I still haven't been expecting to inherit anything because I had always assumed she had multiple mortgages on each property or whatever.

[b]So later she told me: when I die, you and your brother will inherit X house (being the house my sister lives in) and you two need to let your sister live there until she wants to move (I am not sure if she meant a life estate for my sister or what). So I replied: why not just give her the house? Why aren't you giving it to her? And she said: "well she's getting everything else, so this seemed fair."[/b]

Yeah. I am not telling my brother. He will freak. So it's like that.[/quote]

:lol:  :lol:  :lol:  [/quote]

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