Reply to Dad in our friend group had a mental break and threatened to kill another child in the friend group, advice needed

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "Dad in our friend group had a mental break and threatened to kill another child in the friend group, advice needed"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]

OP,

This man is in an advanced state of paranoia, and he's in a very dangerous state of mind. This might be brought about by untreated bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and a host of other psychiatric disorders. Episodes can also be triggered or worsened by cannabis, alcohol or other drugs.

The wife is in great danger if she leaves her husband, and she puts the lives of her children at risk as well if she leaves without them.

I don't think many posters on this thread understand this. She will be the first to be shot if she counters him in any way, because he likely views her as "his property", and he will not accept remonstrations or "abandonment" from that quarter.

This is the classic scenario of a deeply paranoid male, and femicides the world over attest to the risk this mother faces.

So shame on all the posters criticizing this woman.

That being said, yes, it would be great if this man was diagnosed, treated with medication and then, when he's less of a danger to himself, if his wife could leave him (because he's never going to be well). But this is fraught. Most people who suffer from paranoid delusions refuse treatment, and it's practically impossible to get an involuntary psychiatric hold and forced medications.

So you can ask the woman closest to her, to have a talk with her about this options. Or you can make a coffee appointment with her to walk her through this: she would need to consult and attorney and a psychiatrist. But the reality is that she's stuck really badly and it will take monstrous effort on her part to get out with her girls safely.

What you can do is control your own life and that of your family.

I would persuade the other families to send some representatives to see the school Principal, and ask that this man be barred from the school grounds. That his photo be memorized by front desk staff and that security protocols be reinforced in terms of door locks and enforcing that no one holds the door open for anyone else. No exterior door can be left propped open, even when it's hot. Everyone needs to be buzzed in separately, and go to the office first. They need to practice mass shooter drills if they haven't already.

If the mother is not willing to persuade her husband to seek psychiatric help, and the school seems lax in enforcing security protocols, then I would consider changing schools. Historically, men like these tend not to show up at your single family home to shoot you. They go to schools and commit mass murder, or they murder-suicide their families at home. This means you can continue to live in your house, as long as your kids don't go to that school. I hope the people specifically named by him get a restraining order, but it won't stop a delusional person from shooting.

Best of luck navigating this. You're going to need it.

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics