Reply to At odds with spouse ove how much house we can afford

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]700k is too far to bridge. Find an actual option (or a few) which physically demonstrate the difference it would mean for your family and lifestyle now and over the years.

A realtor would be more than happy to work with you on this. BUT, you have got to come down from the 700k. Make it 1.3 and your husband may be persuaded.

Men are visual. Show him something real that respects his more conservative approach[/quote]

This poster is spot on. In your case, it isn't a matter of what you can afford, it's about what it is worth to both of you. If you make it but being able to handle the 700K extra, you are missing the point.  If you go looking at houses, what can you get for 1million versus 1.2 vs 1.4 vs 1.7?  Does your DH value the differences, say a closer commute, enough space in the basement if you have family visiting that they can have their space, an entertainment room he always wanted, a big yard, a place known for being a great community with a pool part of that neighborhood etc.  Then you have to weigh what you would gain as you go up the price range against what you give up to get there.  Does this mean financially cutting back on vacations or if he had been thinking about a beach house, if you own other properties does this increase risk should you have an issue with rent, does it preclude this dream of a career that makes less money but would be more satisfying, or the chance for someone to stay at home with the kids.

Even if you could go 1.7 and not be cutting off options in terms of career or lifestyle, it could come down to DH not thinking it is worth it.  Just because we can afford keeping our house toasty in the winter and cool in the summer doesn't mean we are willing to spend the extra money to do so. I'm wearing my winter lingerie (aka sweatpants and sweatshirt) as I'm typing because to truly be toasty is not something we are willing to pay an extra $100/month, rather put on sweatshirt.

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