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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here.

Welp, things did not go well with dc’s coach and my kids request to continue training at a club where he is getting excellent speed training versus his high school team where the focus is on long distance. Dc is a junior so it’s now or never for him to work on skills he needs for a chance to run in college.

Dc practiced what he would say at home, worked hard to communicate his thoughts respectfully, but unfortunately it went really poorly. Coach basically threatened to ruin him, or at least that’s what he hinted at. ‘You’ll never run again if you don’t do what I say’

Wwyd?? [/quote]

This is actually kind of what I expected. Sorry it didn't go well.

Does he have good relationships at the club? I'm sure they have seen this happen before. Track recruiting is pretty clear cut -- a kid's times speak for themselves. Make sure he is in regular communications with coaches at colleges that interest him. Send them updated times, updated grades, etc. I hope the club coaches can provide some guidance and can get him into some good races. 
[/quote]

Thank you. I guess I thought a grown man could be an adult and see that he has a passionate kid who just wants some extra training (coach even admits he’s long distance focused, and Dc sprints). I guess not. The dude was so inappropriate, I’m sort of stunned.

He just started with this club so he’s going to reach out and try to discuss. He will see that coach on Sunday. You’re right, times are sort of what they are, but I do note that every college coach we’ve heard from has wanted dcs high school coach contact info. And well, the coach basically threatened to sabotage him.

I mean, really? This is how adults overseeing young lives get to behave?? I’m floored. [/quote]

PP whose DC knows track athletes who train with outside coaches - so sorry your son had this experience.  I do think he'd likely be fine for college running if he didn't compete for his high school.  Like you said, it's just about the times.  But he will miss out on the team aspect, which is such a big part of HS sports.  Anyway, hope he got some good advice from his club coach.[/quote]

Thank you so much for responding. It’s been so nice having people chime in here.  Dc is still debating what to do. HS coach gave him until Wednesday to show at pre season practice or said ‘he’s done’ so dc is leaning heavily to just moving to club- HS coach did some other crappy things last year to dc like pushing him to run when he was injured - but you’re exactly right, it’s his teammates he will miss. Despite the school having a culture of ego driven bullying coaches, he loves his school and the kids. [/quote]

Nothing to add, just wanted to say I'm really sorry that your kid is going through this situation. Such crappy behavior from the HS coach.[/quote]

Thank you, appreciate that a lot. My dc did go back to his HS pre season practice yesterday. He spoke to the club coach who was gracious and understanding and admitted that HS track would provide more opportunities for dc, and that he should stick with it, but keep in touch. DC is resigned about it… but I’m still furious and can’t believe this HS coach is going to get away with this crap…

I spoke to another coach (not track) at the school who I am friendly with. He was upset, but not surprised, about the situation. He admitted there is a great deal of ego driven bullying by the coaches at the school. Sad bc the school could be great if the admin would just wake up. Not a public school fwiw. I have other dc at public and I strongly believe they’d be terminated if they ever pulled what this private school coach did. [/quote]

Coaches bullying kids, threatening to ruin them, etc. should never be tolerated in any way.  But the reality is if the private school team is performing well it is highly unlikely that the school administration will ever discipline or fire the coach unless something very bad happens. Your DC did great in having a very tough conversation. Make sure your DC tells someone at the school (counselor, advisor, teacher, administrator) what happened. If you don't have a record of it with others at the school then when it gets [i]really[/i] bad you'll be starting from scratch.

Since private schools can recruit and the good sports program are often aspiration targets for good athletes, a lot of the time private school competitive success doesn't come from the HS programs ability to develop athletes.  Instead it comes from those athletes being developed in other settings (like club) and the HS benefiting from that development.  That often makes these HS coaches very defensive about outside coaching, because it slaps the coach in the face with the fact they aren't developing athletes in their program.[/quote]

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