Reply to If you had an every other weekend parent growing up, what is your relationship like with them now?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]He probably wanted more time but that’s all your mom would allow so he gave up and moved on as there was nothing he could do about it.  So yes if your mom only allowed that schedule and then she wanted to go out of town she needed to make arrangements.

This is what your mom choose for you. [/quote]

He wasn’t a real parent when married with kids. He wasn’t a real parent when divorced. He isn’t a real parent when remarried with adult kids.

Can’t believe a parent wouldn’t take a call from their adult kid want to talk, about anything. I’m so sorry he pesters any request like that.

Mental disorders or not, just detach. He cannot or will not foster a real relationship. That’s sad but happens.  I had to mourn the lack of a real father and role model, due to his aspergers and bipolar a long time. My sister still latches  on to “male attention” in unhealthy ways.  We were essentially neglected by him and continue to be.[/quote]

This.

My father just has some cartoonish idea of what a father is entitled to, yet does nothing.

As kids we were supposed to be fine with being ignored most of the weekend and weekdays by him.  Then suddenly, once a week, he’d force a playtime or bad questions for 5 mins, then disappear again to read or nap or work.

After the divorce he was the same. Here’s breakfast, then walk off. Half the time we never ate it, he didn’t care and he never sat with us before school to talk or eat. Same with dinner.

In adult like he’s the same Check-the-Box. He’ll call out of obligation or tell me or my sister too. Yet he’ll have nothing to say or ask. It’s all so forced. He talks about himself, his new Apple Watch or some space launch.  We tried vacations together but he just sits by himself and we children would have to plan the day.

He doesn’t know anything about us as people or our lives, he never did though. Not when they were married in the same home, not when divorced and coparenting, not now that we’re adults. [/quote]

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