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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As a parent of a child who is an extremely hard worker and a kid who is not, I do not think any amount of pushing will work. The kid has to want to do it.

I have seen kids in college fail without mommy. I would rather my kid fail now than as a college student.[/quote]

why? how is it better to fail in HS?[/quote]

Pp here. DH and I are type A high achievers. Our oldest child is just like us but better. Our middle child is naturally gifted and puts little effort like OP’s kids. He isn’t literally failing but he will get a B because he didn’t study or has missing assignments. [b]I want him to figure this out by himself while he is in middle school.[/b][/quote]

And what if he doesn't? What if he just keeps underperforming?[/quote]

I lose sleep because the kid stresses me out. Getting him to get to middle school on time is even a struggle. I accept the kid he is. I’m not going to be able to push or nag him into Harvard. I have accepted that he may go to Penn State or BU or Rutgers or some good weather school he gets into. He is very social and popular so I hope he will do ok.[/quote]

You are a mess.. he might "have to go to Penn state or BU or Rutgers" ... OMG. [/quote]

I am not a mess. My very smart and talented kid puts in little to no effort. My older child takes all AP classes with straight As with zero effort from the parents. It is hard to watch one kid try so hard and one kid do nothing.[/quote]

What is his talent?    And what’s wrong with accepting he’s a B student?

If my youngest gets all A/Bs when she’s in high school in her regular classes I will be thrilled.   She’s on the chill track not the fast track.    We saved enough for college and I’ll be thrilled if she finds something she loves to do.

Not every kid is an academic super star.  [/quote]

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