Reply to How to tell these parents I can’t help?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you don’t want to do it, then just say no. But understand you’re missing a chance to make a connection that is helpful to someone else who could be helpful to you later.

We went through a similar situation with no busing a couple of years ago. After starting as an indefinite amount of time, it ended up being about 6 weeks before they got it fully restored. It sucked.

I wfh and lost over an hour of work time between drop off and pickups. I found another neighborhood mom to share the burden. She worked shifts, so I definitely drove her kid more than mine, but she did it some. Two years later, we have kids in the same activity and we carpool all the time. My schedule has changed and she drives more than I do. I’m not sure we would be carpooling now if we hadn’t established the earlier relationship. [/quote]

I came to say this. Since you aren't in the DMV, maybe you have family and childhood friends close, and a full community and support system. But for those of us in DC who moved away from our families of origin, we are building community as we go. That means doing favors and being flexible the same way you would if the person asking were your cousin. We do it because it's the right thing to do, but also because we want to build a network of people who rely on us and who we can rely on.

If you are 100% sure that your life is so solid, and predictable, and nothing bad will ever happen to you, then turn these folks down, even rudely. But if you think someday you might go through a divorce, or an illness, or have two kids who need to be different places at the same time, I'd say yes to this request. [/quote]

Many of us don’t have help and figure it out.  You are a user and expect people to help you but not help them.  It’s very disruptive to have to watch a bunch of kids and get them to school for free while getting your own kids ready and to school.

And those of us with health issues still manage to figure it out so don’t use someone like me as a talking point.  [/quote]

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