Reply to Can a young teen wear sneakers to a formal wedding? Ankle support?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You all are making some ridiculous excuses. Do you not recognize the difference between a barmitzvah, red carpet event or high school homecoming (where sneakers are the norm) and an actual black tie event? The norms of black tie have not changed that much; the expectation is still formal, not sneakers. Grown men and women are not wearing sneakers to black tie weddings “just because”.

Neither should OPs daughter. [/quote]

No, I don't distinguish between a bar/batmitzvah or a red carpet event where the code is "black tie".  I don't know any high school homecoming that has a black tie dress code so can't speak to it.  Nor do I want to.

Black tie events used to be limited to the very wealthy for whom it wasn't an issue to follow expensive, rigid dress codes. It's a new millenia and fashion is changing. It's clear you don't like it but we don't have to conform to the silly, privileged, confining rules of old in order to be dressed appropriately for an event.  Seriously! It's more ridiculous to be wearing a pair of strappy heels than demure sneakers - and certainly a lot less comfortable and stable.  Focus on looking good in a dress that fits appropriately than what someone is wearing on their feet!

Serena Williams at the Met Gala with her DH in the white tux with black tie behind her.  Even the jackets don't have to be black any more but I don't hear you bltching about that.
[img]https://i.insider.com/5cd0bcdbe9f08a521c55dee2?width=1000&format=jpeg&auto=webp[/img][/quote]

Met Gala is literally not a black tie event. It is a fashion event on a red carpet.

Bar mitzvah's are for 13 year olds, and the fashion is thus driven.

Black tie is black tie. Just because you want to say that times are changing doesn't mean that the black tie dress code has changed to sneakers.

I personally hate black tie. I am not a pearl clutcher. But if someone says "i'd like to invite you over, and these are the terms of my invite" then you respectfully do your best to abide by those terms -and teach your kids to do the same.  Or skip it.

But don't tell your 13 year old that her "feelings" override perfectly reasonable etiquette.  [/quote]

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