Reply to Children of parents in sexless marriage - how did it affect your relationships and marriage?

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[quote=Anonymous]These posts have helped me decide to keep working on my marriage even though it is difficult. I am a 46 y/o man in a sexless marriage. I am fit and I suppose, "attractive". My wife is also 46, fit and beautiful with the body of a 25 y/o. We have two kids ages 8 and 5. We live well. I make 450k per year and my wife is able to be a stay at home mom (her choice, I would support her either way) and I do activities with our kids several days per week after work so she can play in two tennis leagues. We both are faithful. My wife went into early menopause at age 45 and everything changed. Her libido came crashing down from an 8/10 to 0/10. It created a lot of confusion and insecurity. We went to couples therapy and a lot of anger came out. I am a surgeon and trained many years. It was crazy demanding and I did not do a good enough job as a listener and partner because I was always stressed and/or exhausted. I thought I had done an ok job through it all but I am learning this was not the case. We are working on our issues and we love each other, but we do not have sex. With menopause, some resentment, two young kids, and now an anti-depressant (which lowers libido) the prospects of having a sex life any time soon are dim. I was lost and still am in many ways, but the takeaway from the posts here is to stick it out for my kiddos. If you can't beat em, join em... So I also started taking an antidepressant to kill my libido and this seems to be helping me get thru each sexless day. Seeing my wife in a bikini or sexy tennis outfit was and still is really difficult for me. It sends my body chemistry haywire because I love her. I do feel less anxious and high strung on these days after starting Lexapro. Even though I have low hopes for a normal sex life again, I am doing all the things her therapist says I should be doing in hopes maybe life will surprise me. I am still not sure I can do this forever but for now I am staying the course. Thank you all for your posts they were helpful. [/quote]

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