Reply to What do you think about Upper Schools telling parents to butt out?

Forum Index » Private & Independent Schools

Reply to "What do you think about Upper Schools telling parents to butt out?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm a teacher, and I have almost 20 years of experience.

The situation has radically changed over the past several years.  While most parents are reasonable and perfectly pleasant, there is a small, crazed minority of parents who have ruined the system for the majority of teachers, students, and parents.  These policies are in place because that is the only way to ensure that teachers are not harrassed, slandered, and attacked by a minority of (very, VERY) badly-behaved parents.

I have witnessed a bevy of moms make it their single purpose to humiliate and destroy the careers of colleagues.  I have witnessed parents cursing and shouting at colleagues.  I have directly experienced parents who send me abusive emails before they have bothered to learn the facts of a situation, and parents who cannot conceal their disgust and scorn for teachers in general, and who believe and act as if every teacher is an enemy and peasant who must be bullied.  Again, this is not the majority of parents, but when the minority of badly-behaved parents is allowed to run rampant, it destroys the atmosphere for all teachers at the school, as well as the well-being and possibly the career of the teacher receiving the brunt of the abuse.  I do not think any other working professional routinely endures the insults and abuse teachers receive.  I really don't.

I agree that constructing a wall between parent and teacher is not the ideal way to support students.  But I also don't see any alternative.  I don't think it is possible to fully understand just how bad some parents behave toward teachers unless you have witnessed this.

For the record, I have a track record of strong AP scores and great relationships with students and parents.  Most of the teachers I have seen abused by parents were perfectly competent as well (not all, but even with weaker teachers, abusing them doesn't improve the situation).

I don't know what the solution is here.  But I suggest that rather than blaming the school for these unpleasant policies, you look toward the few badly-behaved parents who have ruined things for us all.

[/quote]

I’m a teacher too. I can handle parents because I’m organized, fair, timely and transparent. It is infuriating to pay $50k a year for teachers who barely do their jobs. And anyone who thinks students should suffer because teachers need to be protected from a handful of mean mommies probably shouldn’t be teaching. [/quote]

I'm a parent and I agree with you.  The role of administration should be to ensure appropriate alignment of teachers, parents, and students for the primary purpose of educating students, especially at the high tuition rates charged.  The reports of rampant adult centricity at many local $$$ private schools (especially during and post-pandemic) is truly ridiculous and alarming.

In spite of (because of?) significant growth in administrative bloat (e.g., "Deans" with vague titles and unclear/undifferentiated responsibilities), our school was truly a disaster in inconsistent standards.  At the end of our DCs' tenure, student life was driven by political agendas and gross corruption in all facets - in the classroom, in student leadership, in college admissions, and on the sports fields. We experienced a rapidly decaying culture and mismanagement for several years and - THANK GOD - are now out of that terrible school.

Student learning (including supporting and scaffolding student self-advocacy) should be the central objective of educators, not: 1.) focused on the whims of VIP/board members; 2.) preemptively avoiding crazy parent behaviors; 3.) gaslighting community members who offer feedback or concerns.  The bottom line is that teachers should be protected by admin from parents who are out of line. Students should know that there are consequences for bad behavior, poor choices, and inadequate preparation and that parents cannot buy their way out of those consequences. Teachers need to be held accountable for inadequate teaching, which includes unresponsiveness to emails/communication attempts, untimely grading and feedback; and inconsistent standards.

These are basic principles but seemingly a lot of area private schools have weak leadership that favors fundraising and optics over actual education quality, and admissions has the luxury of a long line of applicants so no one cares.  It's really depressing, but I'm hopeful that more teachers and parents will start to demand a return to these very basic principles.  Our kids deserve and need better leadership from the adults in their lives - not checked out/burned out/self-involved parents, administrators, and teachers.

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics