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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here, thanks for the insights. I'm not posing this question here to figure out a solution for my sister and parents, but rather, see how others would approach it. I have a young child, and DH and I have talked a little bit about how we want to be a safety net for our daughter as she gets older, but also want her to be independent. Given that this situation with my sister is happening now, it's made me reflect on how to create that balance in the future. [/quote]

We will be a safety net for our kids--they are college and recently launched.  However, that means having a full time job and living within your means.  We help so they can save more for retirement and have a "nicer car", but wouldn't help if they were not financially stable.

In this case, your sister has no business having an animal.  That restricts where you can live and costs money.  She can work 2-3 months in the summer or get a weekend job during the school year.  Heck, tutoring in most nicer areas like you describe will get her $50+/hr.  Do that in evenings or weekends (10-12 hours per week) and she will be fine.  Also if doing that, that is 10-12 less hours to party away and waste money.  There are ways to figure it out.  She is not "struggling" to survive.  She just wants to live a better life than her job will allow.  I would not finance that.

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LOTS OF PEOPLE HAVE PETS. Lots of people in lots of circumstances.

And even if you think that poor people shouldn't have pets - a position I do not share - OP's sister isn't poor! She just wants a nicer apartment than she could afford without parental help!

DCUM people are among the worst, most judgmental people in the world.[/quote]

First, you should not live a lifestyle more than you can afford.  Parents are not obligated to help with that. 
Second, I love pets!  But I would not encourage anyone to get an animal(s) until they can afford them.  That means being on your own for a few year, saving a bit and knowing that you can actually afford to live your life as an adult.  Having a pet means paying for a pet sitter/begging friends to watch them if you travel anywhere.  Pets cost money.  
Right now her sister cannot afford her lifestyle.  She cannot find a place to live that she likes that she can afford.  Having pets likely is NOT helping with that process.

I have a 24 yo.  They are waiting a few years to get settled and make sure their finances are in order before getting a pet.  They know it's not fair to a pet to be at work all day, then hang out with friends 2-3 days per week and not be around for the pet. Also they know if they want to fly home for xmas and other vacations, they need a pet sitter/friends who will watch their animal.  That costs money.  So until they are adequately saving for retirement and 6 month+ emergency fund, they don't want to add $200/month+ in costs (apartment fee for pets, food, supplies, vet expenses)
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